This drives me crazy (not that it takes much)
English is a real bastard of a language to learn, whether it's your first or your second. Everyone knows that.
That's why I'm here to help clear up one of the many points in English that make no sense whatsoever. No logic to the rules, but there you are..it's English.
Apostrophe S ('s) has confounded many a good writer and will no doubt continue to do so.
Being an English student for 30 years as well as a lay etymologist, I would like to clarify just a few things about apostrophe S, if you don't mind:
Apostrophe S is used in two instances.
One is to show possession, as in: "Those are Bob's tools."
The tools belong to Bob, so they are Bob's tools.
There is only one exception to this rule, and that is if you are using the word "it"; even if you are showing possession, you do not use apostrophe S with "it".
This--"It was wagging it's tail"--is wrong. It was wagging its tail. Silly rule? Yep.
The other way apostrophe S is used is in a contraction, or short version of "____ is", as in: "Bob's going to work now," or "It's wagging its tail."
Bob is going to work now. It is wagging its tail.
That's it. Those are the only two instances where you use apostrophe S.
Never ever use apostrophe S in the plural, or multiple sense. "Bob has a lot of tool's", or "The Smith's live next door" is wrong.
Plurals don't use apostrophes, ever.
If you use an apostrophe S to show more than one of something, you will grow hair on the back of your hands.
Thank you for your time.
That's why I'm here to help clear up one of the many points in English that make no sense whatsoever. No logic to the rules, but there you are..it's English.
Apostrophe S ('s) has confounded many a good writer and will no doubt continue to do so.
Being an English student for 30 years as well as a lay etymologist, I would like to clarify just a few things about apostrophe S, if you don't mind:
Apostrophe S is used in two instances.
One is to show possession, as in: "Those are Bob's tools."
The tools belong to Bob, so they are Bob's tools.
There is only one exception to this rule, and that is if you are using the word "it"; even if you are showing possession, you do not use apostrophe S with "it".
This--"It was wagging it's tail"--is wrong. It was wagging its tail. Silly rule? Yep.
The other way apostrophe S is used is in a contraction, or short version of "____ is", as in: "Bob's going to work now," or "It's wagging its tail."
Bob is going to work now. It is wagging its tail.
That's it. Those are the only two instances where you use apostrophe S.
Never ever use apostrophe S in the plural, or multiple sense. "Bob has a lot of tool's", or "The Smith's live next door" is wrong.
Plurals don't use apostrophes, ever.
If you use an apostrophe S to show more than one of something, you will grow hair on the back of your hands.
Thank you for your time.


















Small Thoughts on Big Questions
Question, though. Not to nitpick, but isn't the plural possessive slightly different? I may be remembering this entirely incorrectly from my grammar school days (daze?). For example, they're not the four dogs toys, or the four dog's toys, but the four dogs' toys. Am I right, or I am having another one of my ventures into complete wrongness again?
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Trust your instincts; plural possessive rules (not to be confused with just plain plural rules) state that the apostrophe S would come after the possessors, so " the four dogs' toys" is absolutely correct.
Note that my statement still applies: only use apostrophe S to show possession or as a contraction for "___ is".
Good memory!
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A comic that shares your irritation:
Mum's Word
I have the same issue with commas.
People, they're not just there so you can take a breath. Bloody hell.
Love & stuff
Mrs M
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i seem to remember a couple of options but my memory is hazy so i just avoid them
if there was a fellow called Chris or Ross and they owned a hat do we say Chris's or Chris' or as i sometimes do start writing Chrisses and get really confused and just move the whole sentence around to read "that hat belongs to Chris" haha
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for a plural possessive ending in "s", i.e. :
"Those cracks belong to those asses; therefore those are the asses' cracks."
Oooooweee, my nerdiness is outweighed only by my goofiness.. I don't know how I retain this stuff.
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haha goofiness is a virtue!
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This post appeals personally for two reasons.
Firstly, I have for long argued that English is a rambling, unruly, complex language, and a lousy choice for the global lingua franca that it has become. It's not just the anarchic grammar, where pretty much every rule has exceptions, it is also the vastness of the vocabulary. English has the biggest vocabulary of any alphabet-based language, and the second-biggest of any language. Only Mandarin is bigger, although I'm not surprised after being told by a friend once that Mandarin has a character for "the shape of a fish's mouth as it rises to the surface to breathe". The character, apparently, has 26 strokes. English has twice the vocabulary of French, as recognised by Samuel Shellabarger is his novel Lord Vanity when his 19th-century French heroine, returning home from a trip to England, exclaimed, "Ah, what a relief to escape from the precision of English and return to the generalities of French!" I sympathise with anyone forced to learn English as a second language (as hundreds of millions are), and I think all of us who learned it as kids as a first language are very fortunate. So I fully agree with your statement that, "English is a real bastard of a language to learn", although, in a couple of decades of trying, I never said it so well.
Secondly, ten years or so ago I was challenged by a friend to teach her how to use apostrophes. We did it slowly, and made it fun, and in the end she was discovering curly apostrophe questions (of which, as we all know, there are plenty) for discussion. I wish I had kept the correspondence because it was a fun and interesting exercise.
My knowledge of grammar comes from the old newspaper journalism school. I can (just) remember the days of hot-metal typesetting, so I go back a way. Newspaper veterans aren't grammatical experts, as degree-wielding, terminology-toting products of academia might be, but they know the language as well as anyone. I once heard a hardened survivor of a million editing decisions challenged by the enthusiasm of youth. "Do you know," said the precocious one, "what a gerund is?" "No," replied the grizzled one, "not unless you use it incorrectly."
Finally (I've written blog items shorter than this comment!) can I suggest one change to your excellent post, which is that it should talk about rules for the "apostrophe", rather than rules for the "apostrophe S". A possessive apostrophe can follow a Z as well, and there can be contractions not involving an S, such as "I've". The discussion is really about the punctuation mark known as the apostrophe.
Regards,
Chris
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What a coincidence that you brought up Mandarin. I've always been fascinated by the written as well as spoken Mandarin language. So much nuance; it really makes English look easy in comparison.
Thanks for commenting.
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